So thank you to the 2 people who had commented and said hey when I stated I'm alive.
I'm on Myspace alot.
I think I might marry the internet. No, seriously. It makes me so happy. After not having the internet like, ever, and finally getting wireless- ITS FUCKING AMAZING.
I CAN READ SHIT
I CAN DOWNLOAD ALL THE MUSIC I WANT
I CAN RESEARCH THINGS, RANDOM THINGS
I CAN WATCH MOVIES
I CAN MAKE FUN OF PEOPLE TO FEEL GOOD ABOUT MYSELF
Seriously, if you have the internet and don't use it for some kind of weird stalking/bashing, I say you're a fucking liar.
to the journal-ing:
I'm bleaching my hair again.
I'm probably going to post some pictures.
The problem with having all this neat internet stuff to do is that you can get distracted and get lazy, and not want to do anything with it.
Is anybody out there?
I decided to pick up all the pieces of myself from past lives when I was at a happy point with myself,
and piece it together
into my own
"and they think i'm depressed because i don't have geo. so they bring artists around to cheer me up."
i got fired today.
on mybirthday i thought i was going to slam into cars and die.
what a fucking week.
please sir, smash me in a different light.
weird/nerveracking/half hour lunch break
my bad, yo.
not getting my hair cut
(because it badly needs it)
strange things be a'brewin.
i feel it in mah bones,child.
especially the sternum.
and the ribs.
oh all the chapelle shows i've never seen.
it was pretty
i took pictures.
stupid pills instead of making it better it only makes things worse.
and everyday i love him just a little bit more
a little bit more
a little bit more
and he loves me the same.
baby if you wanna get high....
i saw red.
i wish the future would hurry the fuck up already.
i feel as though i'm teetering on the edge of something absolutely huge.
i'm going to attempt to make a pinhole camera out of a garbage can. wish me super luck.
for the record,
i really do suck at guitar.
i really rock ass at making people laugh so hard they cry.
i know who is who and what is what and which way to look to see the stars.
i am renegade.
i've decided that one day,very soon, i will be living in san francisco. i will see mountains. i miss mountains.
and good music. southern california = one of the birth places of hardcore punk.
and its got an ocean.
maybe in between schools? i'm not sure when or how but yes, it will be done. at least for a short while. because i've decided aside from chicago and canada, there is only one other place i would ever consider having a permanent address in.
chicago has my heart, but my eyes and body will grace other sites at different intervals of time.
i want to be like them, so badly. All that is good & courageous & brilliant & lovely & secure. And together, even when they were falling apart. They were so together, seperately and united.i'm scared of never being everything they were.
instead i'm this snotty, ragged piece of girl.i'm not accomplished, and i'm scared i never will be.